Man, there is nothing worse than a sick goat!

Man there is nothing worse than a sick goat! Except of course if it’s a sick family member or friend, or friend or family of a friend, or…you get my point. Human illness is more difficult to deal with than animal. I remember when our first child was born. She stayed in the hospital for a week on monitors. When we brought her home I missed the monitors telling me she was o.k.. In the hospital there was, second by second, confirmation. At home, for the first week or two, I was constantly checking to be sure she was breathing.

Back to the original subject, this goat of mine. We have five nannies all ready to kid in the next week or two. Everything was coming along fine until one of my best does comes up lame on her right rear leg. I checked her over multiple times looking for a bad hoof but could find nothing. Then I began looking at metabolic sources like Founder. It could be. I thought about the possibility she got kicked by one of my cows, fairly unlikely. She could have been exploring on the huge brush pile out back and got twisted up. Are you getting the sense that I’m not quite sure what is wrong with her. That’s the worst, not knowing what is wrong so I can treat it, fix it.

I could call a vet. She still has a good appetite. She’s still alert. She still goes in and out with her fellow nannies. Is the vet even going to be able to tell me something I don’t already know? Is she maybe even getting a little better? I’ve done the things that I can do. We’ll just wait and see what happens. Man, there is nothing worse than a sick goat!

I’m nursing my own sore foot. Plantar fasciitis is a painful condition of the foot. Ironically, as I go out to check on Iris, my nanny, I limp on my own right foot. I know what the problem is. I need to stretch my Achilles tendon, take some ibuprofen, ice and rest. I’m too busy. But at least I know what the problem is and how to fix it. So far I’ve been dealing with the pain rather well. I keep saying to myself; “I’ve gotta take care of this thing!” I think it may be getting worse. As I sit here my foot is throbbing. Why don’t I take care of the problem, my own problem? A problem I have identified and can treat. Instead I’m worrying more about my goat’s problem? Just thinking about how I walk out to the pasture in pain to check on my goat with the foot problem because I fail to take care of my own foot problem, I’m feeling a little silly.

I have to think of how Jesus uses the log and the speck illustration. It is so easy to recognize a problem in a neighbor. I wonder what's wrong with them? So often it seems worse than our own problem. They should really do something about their problem! Are you talkin' to me?

Greater is the one who is in you!

I'm finally back to blogging. My energies have been going in some other directions recently and I'm taking a little window of time here to write a bit of what I've been ruminating about.

One of my favorite memories is of a trip into the Boundary Waters of Minnesota with a group of guys from church. The Boundary Waters holds a special place in my heart. A million acres of wilderness. Low impact camping and canoeing for a whole week. At the mercy of the elements. Hardwork, bugs, and wild creatures like wolves, and bears, and moose...danger! danger! danger! (Definetely needs an Australian accent) The experience tests your survival skills and your ability to endure. I've been out in the boundary waters 6 different times. Each experience is unique. The first experience was probably the most challenging simply because it was my first time. I had no idea what to expect and everything took energy. Each trip got a bit easier even though we added new challenges. A hole in a canoe, a sliced up foot, a nasty thunder storm, no campsites available on the last night, a sick boy. Yes, there were times when I felt a bit overwhelmed. Like when the major thunderstorm hit right after the hole in the canoe incident. Wilderness for me is that place where I come face to face with my limits. I enter the Boundary Waters never quite knowing what to expect. I haven't been back since we moved to Virginia and I am longing to get back. Why do I love that place so much? Mosquitoes, 1/2 mile portages with 80lbs on your back, mud, no hot showers, sleeping on the hard ground.

I remember singing the song "Greater is he that is in you, Greater is he that is in you, Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world." That line comes from 1 John 4:4 and in my NRSV it reads "Greater is the one who is in you than the one who is in the world." I like that a bit better. The song is like a rally song for followers of Jesus Christ. God's Spirit is within us! WHAAAAAA! There's nothing that we cannot overcome! WHAAAAAA! The crowd goes wild and charges off into the wild blue yonder!

The Boundary Waters for me is about adventure. I go there to see what I can see. To slow down and take it all in. To challenge myself. To pare down to the basics, water, food, and shelter. The way I have come to think about the experience is that the more challenges we face the better the stories when we get back in. Listen to what we overcame. The bugs and other stuff is undeniably a part of the experience.

I'm thinking, pondering, wrestling with the call to return to the pastorate. Depending on what I focus on I lean one direction or the other. I think God has put the song and my experiences in the Boundary Waters into my head recently for a reason. I don't doubt my desire to get back to the Boundary Waters.

Is it Nature or Creation?

I suppose it’s really not that big of a deal, whether we use the word “Nature” or “Creation” to describe the material world around us. It’s not a deal breaker. Perhaps not even a distinction worth discussing. My friend David Kline titled one of his books Scratching the Woodchuck: Nature on an Amish Farm. Why am I even thinking about this? I was talking with a good friend just this morning. He referred to my connection with “nature” as significant. It struck me, I don’t think of it as a connection with “nature” but as a connection with “Creation”.

I had my oldest daughter look up the definition for nature in our dictionary. The pertinent definition of nature is simply, “the material universe”. The definition for “Creation,” on the other hand, connects “all created things” with “the act of creating: the bringing of the world into existence out of nothing.” The definition implies a “creator” and for me, consciously using the term “creation” is a confession of faith. It’s like proclaiming Psalm 19:1 “The heavens are telling the glory of God; and the firmament proclaims His handiwork.”

“Creation” reminds me that I am not alone. I am reminded that there is order and a sovereign wisdom behind the “material world” that transcends what I can, at first glance, see and comprehend. I remember beginning to read Julius Reuschel’s book “Grass-fed Cattle” and having my eyes opened to the wonders of weeds. Reuschel writes about a system of raising cattle that pays attention to the way cattle were created to function in the beginning. Cattle are ruminants, meaning they have a unique ability to utilize the nutrients contained in plant material that animals without a “rumen” are unable to breakdown. When a cow is fed this sort of plant material, versus grain, it is not only more likely to experience greater health. This same cow will produce milk and meat that is significantly healthier for the human’s who consume it. It makes sense to me from a faith perspective. This is the glory and handiwork of God.

Reuschel goes on to talk about the variety of plants in a healthy pasture. I was fascinated to learn that there are plants that have the ability to increase or decrease the levels of particular nutrients in soil depending on the need. Certain plants have unique root acids that enable them to break down minerals that without this acid working remain unavailable to other plants. There are plants that have exceptionally deep root systems that enable it to tap into mineral resources that are out of reach for other plants. There are plants that have the ability, in cooperation with micro-organisms to pull nitrogen out of the air and fix it in the soil for use by other plants who need it. Often times these unique plants are identified as weeds(undesirable). And yet, when a cow grazes a pasture with a diverse population of plants that cow is much more likely to find the balance of nutrients they need for healthy development and production. I found in this book and the author’s description, a powerful illustration of the strength found in diversity and the wisdom found in creation.

The more I learn about God’s creation the more curious I get, the greater my sense of awe and wonder. I have become aware of how often I struggle against God’s will and wisdom, in both my relationship with fellow humans and with the whole of God’s creation. I don’t want to take the time and energy necessary to understand what all is going on. I jump to conclusions based on my own self interests. It is way to easy to reach for the herbicide to rid my green pasture of those pesky thistles. I don’t want to hear that it may have to do with my pasture management. By the way, I’ve found that my goats love thistle flowers, kind of like I enjoy good chocolate. This takes care of the reproduction problem, at least in my pasture. Anyways, the more I learn about creation, the deeper my faith and love for the Creator has grown. I’ve begun investing in books that provide descriptions of God’s creation. They may call themselves nature guides, but I read them as creation guides. I’ve got so much to learn.

Goats!

“Goats! Goats, Goats, Goats!” is kind of like, “Guts! Guts, Guts, Guts!” If I remember right it was either Pippy Longstocking or Junie B. Jones who warned her classmates that she was really frustrated and was ready to let fly with some bad language when she launched into the “Guts! Guts, Guts, Guts!” More than once I’ve been really frustrated with my, Goats! Yes, goats can be extremely frustrating, and yet they are one of my favorite animals on our farm.

This past week I was reading in the gospel of Matthew and came upon the section where Jesus talks about separating the sheep from the goats. I’ve never kept sheep. I’ve read about sheep, but I’ve never worked closely with them. For a little over a year we’ve kept goats. Having worked with goats I’ve had to ponder Jesus’ contrast between the two in a whole new way.

This is the second go-round for goats on our property. The first time I sold them after several months simply because our fences weren’t good enough to keep them in. There’s a saying about goats and fences. It goes like this, “If you want to know if your fence will keep goats in, you take a bucket of water and throw it at your fence, if the water goes through the fence, so will the goats. Actually, the saying isn’t too far off. The first two goats I had would walk our fences looking for a way to get out. When they found a bit of an opening, and it didn’t take much (our fences were pretty old and brittle) they would squeeze through or hop over and begin browsing on whatever they could find. They didn’t take off and go great distances, they just got out. I would call them and they’d come running. I’d put them back in and they’d trot right back to the opening and squeeze through again. Often, once through, they would look back at me, as if to say, “Dude! There’s a hole in this fence! I think it’s about time you fix it! You don’t expect me to stay in if there’s a hole in this fence, do you?” My solution? I sold’em!

About year and a half ago we did some major upgrading to our fencing. I decided to try goats again. I bought 3 nannies and had them bred in December. In May we had a total of 6 kids. Five of them were nannies and 1 was a buck. What a joy to see those little kids hopping and bopping around the barnyard throughout the summer. Our girls spent hours out in the pasture holding them, petting them, and playing with them. I carry with me this mental image of Joy! It’s the sight of those little goat kids romping around out in the pasture.

A reminder, goats can still be awfully frustrating. A goat will pass up plentiful browse and pasture to stick their head through a regular woven wire fence and eat whatever they can reach outside of the fence. The problem comes when they go to pull their head out of the fence their horns catch and they’re stuck. You can help them out, only to have them go a little further down the fence and do it all over again (a single electric wire at the right height or more expensive fence solves this). Even more of a problem is what the other goats do when one has their head stuck. In an effort (I give them the benefit of the doubt) to get their fellow goat out of the fence, they will repeatedly ram into the side of their trapped compadre. Goats can be quite forceful in their efforts to free one another. I can talk to them all I want but they never seem to understand that their efforts are doing more harm than good.

I’ve had to wince on numerous occasions when witnessing how my goats will thump each other. At times it is around the feed trough or water barrel. At times it’s just to let the other goat know who’s who. There have been times when I thought the thump surely would result in a serious injury but they always seem to bounce back. Over time a hierarchy develops and the lesser ones certainly learn when it’s time to get out of the way.

I’ve seen a greater goat stand sideways in front of a feeder while eating grain to keep the lesser goats from eating. I’ve seen a greater goat push 4 other goats the whole way to the end of the feed trough and keep them there while she keeps eating. Greedy little buggers! I will often stand in between the greater goats and the least, just to keep the greater ones from hogging all the feed. It’s frustrating. I try and talk to them but they just don’t seem to get it. I think Jesus has seen the same kind of thing.

On the flip side, those crazy goats will come running from anywhere in the pasture when they see me walking. They’ll come right up to me and nuzzle me, talking the whole time. I love to watch them grazing and have them each come to me at different times for a good scratch. I love to watch them playing in one of the mulberry trees that juts out from the bank in our pasture. From very early on goats will climb up on whatever they kind find. One of our goats climbed up on top of an old mineral block and balanced there when only several hours old. They’ve climbed up on the hood of my Steiner tractor, on the bed of my pickup truck and, to the top of our large brush pile out back. Goats love to see how high up they can climb and love to play king of the hill once there.

We are scheduled to have kids again in the middle of May. I plan to keep goats around as long as we are on the farm. Every time they do something that frustrates the tar out of me I’m reminded of what God must be thinking. I may also have to get some sheep around at some point. I’m hoping I can see myself in sheep more than I can see myself in my crazy goats.

Good Soil

A friend of mine, David (not Mr. Kline) used to say “If life gives you garbage, make compost!” I’m not sure if the statement is original to him or not? Whether or not it was, he certainly lived into it both literally and figuratively. David had slowly lost his hearing over the course of many years. By the time I learned to know him, he was severely limited in his ability to hear. The loss affected his ability to follow along in worship and to carry on a conversation in a group or public setting. His wife would diligently scribble notes to assist him in following along, but sometimes it was not enough. David’s hearing loss was accompanied by severe headaches and dizzy spells. There were days when he would be totally incapacitated by his physical condition.

What amazes me is that David continues to make compost with the challenges (garbage) he has been given. David is a master gardener. Besides the impressive gardens at his home, David provides leadership and resources for a community garden that raises an impressive amount of vegetables, fruit, and flowers for a local food pantry. He does so with a unique style of gardening where he never tills but is continuously adding leaves and grass clippings and whatever other organic matter he can get his hands on. In the fall David can be seen driving around town picking up bags of leaves from in front of people’s homes to haul back to the pantry garden.

David literally makes compost from garbage. And his gardens are incredible. When everyone else’s garden is hard and dry in August his is moist and loose enough to dig up potatoes with your bare hands. He uses very little, if any, fertilizer because of the richness of the compost and the activity of the worms and other creatures that inhabit the soil.

Jesus tells “anyone with ears to listen” a parable about a Sower (Matthew 13:1-9) who went out to sow wheat. The star of the parable is the “good soil” that brought forth grain (fruit), some a hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty. Wendell Berry has written, “I don’t think it is enough appreciated how much of an outdoor book the Bible is” and I couldn’t agree more. Here’s Jesus sitting in a boat at the edge of the lake teaching a crowd and talking about good dirt. He might as well have been talking about David’s garden.

What you learn when you begin studying what makes up good soil is that it is alive. Good soil is more than just a solid place for the roots to grow. Good soil has worms and bugs and bacteria and fungi. It not only has living creatures in it but, it has a good amount of old, dead plant matter. Stuff that is in the process of being broken down by all of those little creatures so that it’s nutrients can be used by the new plants to produce a hundredfold. This is the stuff that Jesus is talking about, good dirt! Now one might argue that Jesus didn’t know all of this when he was sharing the parable of the sower, after all Jesus was a carpenter, and soil science has only recently evolved. But, when we read (John 1:3) that “all things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being.” I think it’s safe to say Jesus knew of what he spoke.

Perhaps if Jesus would have shared his parable today he might have included a description of the soil that has had so many chemicals sprayed on it that the worms, the bugs, the bacteria and fungi, along with the dead plant matter being broken down are no longer present. So much so that the nutrients needed for the grain to grow must be delivered ready-made for the plant to survive. This soil is deceiving in that it produces possibly 150-fold but delivers less nutrition to the humans who consume it. Believe it or not, research has shown that today’s corn, wheat, and oats contain fewer nutrients than they did 50 years ago. In large part, this is because farmers failed to pay attention to the importance of good soil. In the rush to push the production envelope and increase yields they settled for less.

The temptation to produce and have “more” is powerful. I remember growing up with my mom fixing meals out of the “More with Less” cookbook. The truth that more is not always better, bigger is not always better, seeped into my conscientiousness at an early age. This doesn’t mean that I’ve never struggled with wanting more, I do all the time. I’ve found that I could always use at least 10% more income. I am powerless to resist, powerless that is unless my soil, is good soil.

My soil, my heart and mind, must be alive with God’s Holy Spirit. And I must allow God’s Spirit to be at work in there on the “dead plant matter.” Those experiences in my life, both good and difficult, provide the components, the nutrients needed, for me to continue to bear fruit. I can try and do it through artificial means, my own way, ignoring what makes for good soil. But the fruit, though it may be plentiful, will be sub-par at best. I look at my friend David’s life and recognize this truth evident in his life. God’s Spirit has been at work in his soil taking some of the garbage he has been given and breaking it down in a way that has produced some incredible fruit. It takes patience. Compost isn’t made in a day. I’m learning to be patient.

Look At The Birds

I’ve been inspired over the past number of years by several authors. I see these authors as ember tenders. They’ve found a way to brush back some of the ash surrounding glowing embers. These are ideas and principles and values and wisdom that I have found to resonate in scripture. Stuff that many are now beginning recognize as glowing embers. I believe it’s time we bring some fresh air and add some hardwood.

One of these writers I had the pleasure of meeting this past January on a week long trip to Ohio. David Kline is an Amish Bishop and Farmer in Holmes County Ohio. David has written two books that are listed amongst my books that inspire me (see the sidebar). What an inspiration to sit beside the woodstove in his living room and talk about everything from Anabaptist history to eschatology to birds and “a faint tinge of skunk”.

One of David’s quotes that struck a cord with me is from his book Great Possessions. David writes “we farm the way we do because we believe in nurturing and supporting all our community—that includes people as well as land and wildlife.” This line has become a sort of purpose statement for our little farmette here in Rockingham County, Virginia.

I love the idea and the experience of providing healthy and sustainably raised meat and eggs for our family and several others as well, including some individuals who are in need of assistance. But our efforts go beyond just the people. One of the ways David has inspired us is in the starting of a bird list on our property.

Some of the ash that has been covering glowing embers for me has been an ignorance and apathy about the variety of God’s creation that exists all around me. I used to think a sparrow is a sparrow is a sparrow. I thought “they’re brown and rather boring, they all look alike”. That is until I began to recognize the fact that multiple varieties were visiting our feeder. There were white throated, white crowned, song, house, and maybe several more that I’ll identify as I look closer and pay more attention. That’s just the sparrows! I’ve come to look forward to seeing the chickadees and trying to figure out if we have the black-capped or just the Carolina. One of my favorites is the tufted titmouse. And the Cardinals, how many pairs do we really have? I even believe I spotted a horned lark out in one of the fields beside our property. I read about all the different warblers that frequent David’s farm and am convinced I have got to see one of these elusive birds.

I can almost hear Jesus saying “Look at the birds of the air”. In the past I would have read these words, and thought about the birds just long enough to confirm that they were of less value than me and remember that I’m not supposed to worry because of them. It seems to me the only thing that stuck was that the birds were not very valuable because I certainly found myself worrying about going out and getting my fair share.

I don’t think Jesus was saying “remember the birds aren’t very valuable.” I believe Jesus was saying “Look at the birds of the air. Go on, look at them.” Jesus was outside after all, teaching in the open air, up on the mountain. Who knows what birds he was pointing to as they were flitting around searching for seeds and insects or soaring above, riding the thermals searching for prey or carrion? I have come to see the significance of Jesus mentioning the birds and the lilies. Jesus was notorious for mentioning and associating with the “least of these” and speaking of the Father’s love for them. Even the birds, who are of little or no economic value to anyone, are cared for by our heavenly Father. The message is not “Those birds are worthless, don’t waste your time or resources on them” but “Look at the birds – they may seem less valuable to you but your heavenly Father cares about them and has provided for them in His infinite wisdom found in His good creation. And, God has provided for you, as well, in his infinite wisdom found in His good creation. Yes, even those people who you seem to believe are worthless.”

David Kline shared with me that he had recently led his congregation from a New Order Amish to an Old Order Amish affiliation. His reasoning? “It came down to feeding the birds” is what he told me. This is where the conversation moved to eschatology and theology and Anabaptist history. There is so much wrapped up in “feeding the birds”.

I find in David’s writing about the birds and creatures that inhabit his 70 acre farm a profound understanding of the depth and breadth of God’s love. A sense of awe and respect for the wisdom and power of God as revealed in His creation. There is a tangible humility and seriousness as David articulates his sense of call to care for all of his community, the “people as well as land and wildlife”.
What frustrates me is when these ideas are seen as only some sort of leftist agenda or tree hugger fanaticism. Here is where I’m acutely aware of those fluffy white ashes that can choke out the fresh air and keep the fire from burning in me. It is precisely at these moments that I am both grateful for and challenged by Jesus’ reminder to “look at the birds of the air”. It is the fresh air that is needed, the hardwood that provides heat for my home.

Tending Embers, an explanation for a new thing

If you have ever heated with a woodstove you know of the value of tending embers. In the morning after the fire has burned steadily through the night once solid seasoned hardwood is reduced to soft fluffy white ashes. The house has cooled a bit as the fire has gone down. One can almost be convinced that the fire is completely gone. But, if you brush away the ashes you can, if you haven’t waited too long, find glowing red-hot embers waiting. The ashes serve as an insulating layer around the glowing embers, limiting the oxygen flow and slowing the burn. As the ashes are brushed away and fresh air reaches the glowing embers they gradually increase in brightness and will, with enough oxygen flow, begin to flame once again.

And so the idea is to gather the embers close to the air intake, put fresh pieces of seasoned hardwood on top of the embers, open up the air intakes to flood the embers with oxygen. In short order the embers burst into flame and feed off of the fresh fuel around them. The air supply can then be reduced to a more sustainable level. Soon the house is toasty warm again.

During the day one is able to refuel the fire in such a way as to maximize the heating potential of the stove while maintaining a more steady flow of heat into the home. Incidentally, with the modern day high-efficiency wood-burning stoves one can heat a reasonably sized home in a sustainable, carbon neutral, manner.

I find myself coming out of a long winter’s night. The room is a bit cooler than it once was. I recognize the presence of the white fluffy ashes. There have been times when I’ve wondered if there were still embers glowing in the midst of them. Recently I’ve worked to brush away some of those ashes to reveal the fire that is slowly burning within. Fresh air is beginning to reach those embers and I’m seeking the seasoned hardwood to fuel the warming of the house once more. This blog going forward will be one outlet for the warmth as it comes, thus the title “Tending Embers.” My hope is to tend in such a way as to provide a more steady flow of heat to the home.